Katie and I Share a Toothbrush

Stephen Kleinjung Life, Our Family 0 Comments

Yep. We do. This one in fact:

toothbrush

Obviously we didn’t always, because:

  • We didn’t always know each other and…
  • We didn’t always live together.

Now, this isn’t some publicity stunt, nor is it a missionary thing. We aren’t so broke that we can’t afford another one (BUT if thinking that compels you to give to our work here, then it is totally because we can’t afford more and you can sign up to support us HERE.)

You see a year before we got married I mentioned to Katie that I always wanted a Philips Sonicare toothbrush. I just didn’t understand why people wanted them and if they were worth the money but I couldn’t bring myself to buy one, too expensive. She graciously got me one for Christmas (in case you’re wondering, they are AWESOME and if you have an extra almost $200 you totally SHOULD buy one.)

I thoroughly enjoyed using it. Little known fact about the Sonicare, when you buy it, it comes set in what they call a “ramp up” mode because the sheer onslaught of sonic power that you would unleash on your gums would cause you to bleed to death out of your mouth if you don’t allow time to adjust. So, it has to slowly increase the power over the course of about a week.

After we got married I could see Katie eyeballing my Cadillac of a toothbrush over her knock off Oral-B electric brush. In my infinite generosity, I went to Target and purchased some extra brush heads so we could each have one and told her that she could use it. The thing about Sonicare toothbrush heads is that you can put different colored plastic rings on the bottom of them so as to differentiate between multiple users and save money on buying multiple motors (clearly other married couples have had this issue.)

Over the course of the first month I began to notice that the purple brush head (MY brush head) always seemed to be on the motor. At the time, in my naivety, I thought to myself “Oh that’s nice, she always puts mine back on!”

….

As a month or so more passed I noticed that Katie’s brush head seemed to look brand new, while mine was looking worn. Again, I must be some kind of blind dupe, because I just thought “Katie should really apply more pressure when she brushes, she doesn’t seem to be doing a very good job.” There was one final warning sign that I just seemed to ignore, every time I brushed my teeth after Katie, my brush head seemed to be a little damp. I never thought to check hers… I mean WHO USES SOMEONE ELSE’S TOOTHBRUSH.

The illusion I had set up for myself finally came crashing down when I came home earlier than she expected from work. There she was … in the bathroom … brushing her teeth. I stood there in horror as I watched the little purple ring of the brush head, MY brush head, plunge in and out of her mouth, used toothpaste dripping down the entire shaft.

“Oh! Hey babe! You’re home early!” She said nonchalantly (of course it was harder to understand than that because MY toothbrush was in her mouth, but I knew what she was saying.) I was stunned at how flippant she was about it all. I essentially had just walked in on the toothbrush equivalent of an extra-marital affair, but she thought nothing of it.

I think I may have said something about it, but any objection I could have possibly mustered was halfhearted as the insidious reality set in that I had been, for the better part of a year, using that same toothbrush anyway.

I hadn’t melted. Frankly, grosser things had happened between us at this point. I just let it be. I thought of just starting to use her toothbrush head, but I really liked to color purple and it didn’t seem right that I should have to change.

So, days and months went by and we just continued to share our toothbrush. Quietly keeping it to ourselves, because, I mean, who DOES that? The Sonicare broke about a year later (I blame Katie), and I knew that our toothbrush sharing lives had been sealed when I said to Katie “We need to buy us a new toothbrush.”

We were planning on being missionaries at this point so it was just a manual “analog” toothbrush. It cost $1.50. It had become my new normal.

Why tell you this?

Well, I want you to know who you are supporting or thinking of supporting, but mostly, I was feeling really sentimental about my wife.

I love her more than life. I can’t imagine what my life would be like without her. I surely couldn’t be doing this Thailand thing. This whole thing can be hard, but I definitely know I can do it as long as she’s with me.

Besides, doesn’t it say in Genesis 2:24: “For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one MOUTH (emphasis mine.)”

…or at least it’s something like that.

Posted by Stephen

Posted by Stephen

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